What’s Different Now?
Super Bowl Sunday! (I started writing this Sunday night) The only time I have seen non-sports fans and sports fans alike come together…that’s so cheesy. I’m not really into sports and what not but I must say I do enjoy a good Super Bowl party. So it’s weird to me when I find myself wondering why is this year so different. It takes me a second to realize that what’s different this year, my daughter.
This time last year I was about 6 months pregnant and trying to figure out what kind of mom I would be if I didn’t even like kids. My boyfriend and I had only been an official couple for about the same time as well. My pregnancy just kind fast forwarded our lives and we were just trying to catch up to it. You know, no one ever really says how long it’s takes for your mind to catch up with the reality of the situation. There is a little person on the way to intrude and shake up your daily routine and life. So there I was, this virtually unknown person entering into their home carrying their, niece, cousin, grandchild, and great grandchild. Needless to say I was terrified. I nearly peed myself (pretty sure it was the pregnancy) trying to work up the courage to ring the doorbell and meet these people. It was pretty awkward but not in a negative aspect. You see, I’m kind of a wall flower not in a super shy sense but more so to do with the fact that I get incredibly awkward and reclusive. It’s like because all my short life I have generally been very different from other people whether its from music, cloths, the way I talk I have just never been able to connect with people properly. So I stuck close to my boyfriend who was so absorbed in the game, I ate most of his food and he thought he ate it. All in all the anxiousness was in my head for the most part. I was received pretty well, especially by his grandmother. She is the sweetest, cutest, shortest, hypochondriac, whose approval mattered the most to me beside my boyfriend’s mom. As it stand now both our families seem to mesh pretty well together and I couldn’t be any more happier or grateful for that.
However, my point is that, now that my daughter is here certain events have changed. Things that I have basically been doing over and over for years, I must now change because I must integrate my daughter and my newfound mommy-hood*. It can honestly be a hassle sometimes but most of the times it’s wonderful. I’m still working on the social life aspect of this but I’ll get there…eventually.
Mommy-hood: a way of life. Everything you do, compels you to include your child(ren), whether you have to or not
21, Pregnant & Broke 